


All I've Ever Needed

by tomfoolery14



Series: Malec Appreciation Week [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Boys In Love, Fluff, M/M, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-03
Updated: 2017-08-03
Packaged: 2018-12-10 15:52:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11694951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomfoolery14/pseuds/tomfoolery14
Summary: Artist/Muse AU in which Alec is an artist in a slump and Magnus is his muse that changes everything.





	All I've Ever Needed

**Author's Note:**

> Second piece for Malec Appreciation Week! Today's theme is alternate universe.

_The portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint_

_You suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them_

_I look at you, and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world_

_-Frank O'Hara_

 

Alec slammed his piece of charcoal down on the easel and pushed off the stool he had been leaning over. “Dammit,” he hissed to himself, rubbing furiously at the back of his neck.  

He’d been working on his presentation piece for his mid-semester evaluation for three weeks now with absolutely nothing to show for it except three trash bags full of shredded canvas. He’d tried all different kinds of mediums, styles, color palettes, and source materials, all to no avail.

He was in a slump.

Just thinking it made Alec’s eyes feel hot with frustration. He couldn’t understand why this had happened now, of all times. He was in his third year as an art student at university and had never once experienced such an infuriating creative dry spell. Especially not during evaluations. In the past, he’d had a finished product available no later than two weeks prior to the due date.

Needing to get some distance from the suffocating atmosphere of the studio, Alec grabbed his things and headed for the university cafeteria for a coffee.

“Hey.” Jace was standing behind the counter of the coffee kiosk, wiping down the counter. “How’s it going?”

Alec groaned, rubbing at his eyes that were feeling itchy and irritated from staring at nondescript black smudges for the last four hours. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Jace gave him an apologetic smile and reached for a new cup. “You’ll come up with something great, Alec. You always do.”

“I’ve never felt so apathetic about my work before. What if this time I can’t pull it off? I could flunk out, Jace.”

“Hey.” Jace paused, waiting for Alec to look at him. “You are _not_ going to flunk out. This place gave you a scholarship, remember? They want you here to represent them because you’ve got a gift.”

Alec sighed, putting his face in his hands as he leaned his elbows on the counter. The soft gurgling of the large coffee machine was soothing, familiar white noise. “Maybe I’m crazy.”

“Hey. Don’t do that to yourself.” Jace nudged Alec’s coffee against his hand.

Alec lifted his head and took his drink in both hands, the blunt sting of heat against his palms helping to clear the static in his head.

“You’ve got good instincts, Alec. That’s part of why you’re so good. Maybe you’ve been doing too much of the same and not using them enough.”

“Maybe. I just don’t know what else to try. I’ve done everything I can think of to look at this project from a different perspective but it’s all a dead end.”

Jace put his hand on Alec’s shoulder. “Go sit down, drink your coffee. Give yourself a break for two seconds. You deserve it.”

Alec gave him a grateful grin and ducked his head in a nod. He grabbed one of the free tables off to the side and put in his earbuds. This was the first break he had taken since he started up again this morning. He’d already had four cups of coffee and felt totally wired, but it wasn’t doing anything to help. Instead, it just accentuated his frustration and made him jittery.

He tipped his head back against the wall, looking over at Jace who was currently leaning across the counter flirting with a girl covered in tattoos. Alec’s attention was then diverted to the man standing behind her. _Magnus_.

He was wearing cuffed overalls with a mesh top underneath and had a jacket slung over his shoulder with one hand. On his other shoulder was a messenger bag covered in colorful buttons. He had on three gold necklaces that disappeared underneath the bib of the overalls, and his fingers were covered in rings. His onyx hair was spiked up and shaved short on the sides and back. It looked like it would be soft to the touch if you ran your fingers through it.

Alec kept tabs on his movements out of the corner of his eye, and when he saw Magnus turn away from Jace, he looked over. Magnus, upon noticing him, smiled and gave a small wave, starting to make his way through the maze of tables.

Alec quickly shoved his things to the side to make room and sat up to make available the other chair.

“Hey stranger,” Magnus’ deep, warm voice seemed to drip over Alec’s ears like syrup.

“Hey.” Alec gave him a grin that he realized he rarely ever used, and gestured to the free chair. “Have a seat.”

Magnus set his messenger bag down and laid his things neatly on the table. “It’s been awhile since I’ve seen you. Where have you been hiding?”

Shaking his head vigorously, Alec responded, “Not hiding. Definitely not hiding. Just busy with my evaluation. I’ve been working on it for weeks and everything I’ve started is total shit. I’m just out of inspiration.”

Magnus gave him a sympathetic smile and broke off a piece of his biscotti, holding it out to Alec. “Are you sure you’re not just being too hard on yourself? You’re a bit of a perfectionist, Alexander.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.” Alec rolled his eyes, though he still had that dopey smile on his face. He couldn’t ever refuse Magnus the affection that was bursting at the seams of his heart whenever he was nearby. “I’m just out of ideas, I think. I’ve tried everything.”

Magnus’ eyes sparkled in the light coming through the windows. It illuminated his irises with backlight that turned them from russet brown to dark, muted red.  “Not _everything_. I seem to recall a certain class you’ve been refusing for quite some time.”

“No,” Alec said immediately, shaking his head. “No way.”

With a playful pout, Magnus looked up at Alec through his eyelashes. “Please? I want you to come see me. And you said you’d give it a try if our first date went well. It’s time you hold up your end of the bargain.”

“Who says I had a good time?” Alec teased. Magnus was nearly impervious, so whenever Alec could manage to get the upper hand, he couldn’t help himself.

It was too good to be true, however, because Magnus tapped his lower lip with his index finger, purposefully drawing attention to it. “As memory serves, I seem to remember a very enthusiastic kiss. Instigated by _you_ , no less.”

“Okay, okay. Yes, I made a promise, and I guess I’ve got nothing to lose…”

“Trying something brand new could be just the creative reset you need,” Magnus agreed, taking a sip of his cappuccino. “And if you find you don’t like it, you never have to go back. I won’t hold it against you. I’ve got other ways of getting all degrees of naked with you.”

Alec squirmed slightly in his seat reflexively. He wasn’t used to being so brazenly flirted with. Especially not this early on in the…relationship? That wasn’t the right word. They’d only been on one date, and before that, they’d only known each other for a few weeks. Magnus was just very forward about his intentions and desires. It was one of Alec’s favorite things about him, truthfully. He liked how Magnus made him feel wanted, and he did his best to return the sentiment. This whole thing was alarmingly new and unfamiliar for him, but Magnus was exceptional and that was more than enough incentive to go out on a limb every now and then.

“Well, the alternative requires some wooing,” Alec pointed out, smiling shyly.

Magnus’ smile was so wide that the corners of his eyes crinkled. It was terribly endearing. “I _love_ a challenge.”

Hesitating for a moment, Alec brushed the back of Magnus’ hand with his own. “What time does it start?”

Magnus glanced at his watch. “Ten minutes. We should head over. I have to be there in enough time to get changed.”

“It takes more than a minute to get undressed?” Alec had one eyebrow quirked in disbelief.

“A gentleman doesn’t discuss the particulars of his intimates, Alexander.” Magnus looked faux-scandalized, a hand over his heart.

“Sorry,” Alec murmured, finishing off his coffee and tossing it in the trash. He gathered his things and followed Magnus out.

Once they got to studio 3F, Magnus gave Alec’s hand a squeeze. “Have _fun_ ; we’re not pulling teeth here, Alexander.” He let go and turned to walk off to the back room when he suddenly stopped and reached out to put his fingers under Alec’s chin. “And hey. Eyes on me.”

Alec nodded and brushed Magnus’ hand as it dropped back to his side. Picking his way between the arranged easels, he chose one near the front corner, out on its own. The last thing he wanted to do was draw attention to himself.

When the professor, a young woman with striking silver hair walked in, the room got quiet. She went back to the room Magnus had disappeared to, and reemerged with him in tow. “All right everyone, time to get started. Magnus, if you will.”

He stepped into the middle of the semicircle and removed his robe. The sharp V that traced from his pelvis down across his hipbones was astounding, and the long planes of muscle that trailed under his bronze skin were impeccable. Alec was temporarily frozen, just looking. He had never seen anything as beautiful in all his life, bias of feelings aside. As he situated himself on the raised platform, Alec marveled at the way his muscles flexed.

Magnus was ethereal, and it was almost unbearable.

Alec put in his earbuds to quiet the anxious buzz in his ears, then began his drawing with an outline of the full body. It was the easiest part, so he figured he would tackle that first.

When he leaned around the easel for another look, Magnus was looking right at him. There was just a whisper of a smile on his lips as he remained still, but there was something in his eyes that surprised Alec. Questioning that he had never seen on him before.

Alec gave him a warm smile, biting his lip shyly, and that seemed to chase away Magnus’ doubt because that strange look dissipated into something sweet.

The farther along Alec got with his sketch, the more it seemed to just flow from his hands. This was the feeling he had been missing for so long, that he had been grasping at straws to get back. The shapes flowed so naturally, and Alec got lost in it. It was addicting.

When Magnus abruptly moved after a stretch of time that felt infinite, it startled Alec and he dropped his pencil. Tugging out one of his earbuds, he heard the soft clatter of the other students putting their materials away and gathering their things.

Magnus tugged the robe back on and stood, stretching luxuriously. “So. How do you feel?”

Alec rolled his pencil between his fingers shyly. “It was…amazing. I felt back in my element again. It’s been so long since the work has just flowed organically.”

Magnus seemed elated at the news, putting his hand on his shoulder. “May I see?”

“Um, sure.” Alec moved aside to allow Magnus access.

His eyes went wide and he traced the shapes with a light touch. “You flatter me, Alexander.”

“Do you not like it?” Alec rubbed anxiously at his palm with the thumb of his other hand.

“It’s beautiful. You’ve got an incredible talent, darling. Maybe a figure drawing is what you should turn in for your evaluation.”

Alec nodded thoughtfully. “Nothing else I’ve done has felt like this. I have to follow this through.”

“I’m not going to say I told you so, so I’m going to require some other satisfaction.”

Alec slid his hand down Magnus’ arm with a gentle touch. “How about if I take you out for dinner?”

Magnus looked playfully contemplative for a moment. “I think that would suffice.”

* * *

 

The next day, upon Magnus’ suggestion, Alec returned to the class. A different body model would be there today, because Magnus had work.

Magnus had graduated from the university the year before and now was a painter for a gallery nearby. Modeling was just easy money on the side. According to him, “all I have to do is sit there a look pretty for a couple hours—I do that every day.”

Alec couldn’t wait to start, to get that rush of power and stability.

The models were a man and woman, intertwined in a complex pose. Alec began with just as much enthusiasm as he had the day before. However, his attitude soon soured when he realized things weren’t following the same pattern as they had before. The lines weren’t easy and fluid, they were forced and sharp. It didn’t feel right anymore. He felt just as listless as he had the last few weeks.

He tried to push through, to somehow sink back into that place where everything made sense and everything flowed. He tugged at his shirt sleeves with frustration, and scrubbed both hands through his hair. He could get the feeling back; he could fix this.

Another hour went by, and he was even more discouraged. He ripped his earbuds out of his ears, tore the paper off the easel, and slipped out.

Magnus. Magnus would know what to do. Getting on the next bus off of campus, Alec headed out to Magnus’ apartment. He felt bad not texting him first to ask if it was okay, but Magnus never had his phone with him when he was painting anyway.

He pressed the buzzer, one long drone, and waited. There was no response. He double tapped insistently, leaning against the door. To his shock, he heard the lock click and he pushed through it, heading up to Magnus’ loft.

Alec had only been here once, the night of their first date, because when he drove Magnus home, he had invited him up for a drink. They’d kissed leaning against the balcony off his living room, bathed in the deep orange light of the setting sun.

When Alec got to the front door of the loft, it was already open just a crack, and he tentatively pushed it open. “Magnus?”

Magnus was in his ratty sweatpants and a black tank top, both of which had Pollock-style paint stains on them. His back was to Alec, putting the roll of his shoulders and the broad expanse of his muscled back on display. He had music playing loudly from the stereo that he was humming along to around a paintbrush he had between his teeth. Using a paint rag, he was smearing a mix of purple and red together.

“Magnus,” Alec spoke just loud enough to be heard over the wail of guitar.

Magnus dropped his rag and flipped off the stereo with a remote in his pocket. “Alexander, hi. I heard someone buzzing me and took a chance.” Grinning, he wiped his hands on his sweats. As soon as he noticed the look on Alec’s face, however, his expression became concerned. “Alec? What’s wrong?”

“Figure drawing isn’t the solution.” He flopped down onto the couch with a grunt. “I sat in that room for an hour and a half, chasing that feeling I got before and…nothing.” Alec pulled one of the crumpled papers from his bag and tossed it at Magnus.

Magnus looked at it closely, scrutinizing it. “It’s not _bad_ ,” he hedged.

“It’s all wrong, Magnus. Yesterday must have just been a fluke or something.” Alec dropped his head into his hands, pushing the heels into his eyes to try to relieve the building pressure.

He felt a dip in the couch when Magnus sat down next to him, their legs parallel and almost touching. “Alexander, I want you to do something for me.”

Alec lifted his head to look at Magnus.

“I want you to draw me.”

“I’m not in the mood for a Titanic reference, Magnus.”

“No.” Magnus rolled his eyes. “I just want you to try again. I think you’re jumping to conclusions.” He peeled off his shirt and tossed it haphazardly at the general direction of the paint tarp he had on the floor. “How should I pose?” Magnus slid to the floor seductively, lying back with his arms and legs out like a starfish. In that position, however, the stained glass of his window cast colored fractals across his face.

“Don’t move,” Alec insisted, pulling out his sketchbook.

“Are you serious?” Magnus questioned, although he hadn’t changed his position.

Alec didn’t respond, instead getting to work on the outline. Just like that, everything snapped back into place. All of his movements were clean and precise, and the image before him was translating perfectly onto paper. Back in his element, he felt that swell of happiness in his chest he hadn’t felt in ages. This feeling was why he had decided to pursue art in the first place. Without it, Alec felt hollow and wrong.

Magnus was still and silent as Alec worked, movements returning only when Alec nudged his foot softly. He sat up, his hands braced behind him on the carpet.

Alec wordlessly held up the sketch and Magnus smiled. “See? It was just a bit of bad luck.”

“No, Magnus, I don’t think it was.” Alec thought carefully about what he was about to say next. “I…I think it’s _you_ , Magnus. I can’t feel inspired without you. You’re what I’ve been missing.”

Magnus was silent as he slowly crawled over to Alec, resting his elbows on Alec’s thighs. “Well, I’ll just have to be sure I don’t go anywhere you can’t follow.”

**Author's Note:**

> you can come find me on champagnemagnus if you want to share your thoughts or ask for something specific you'd like me to write!


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